lovers dance when they're in love

|| credits to we.heart.it ||

wouldn't it be nice to escape from your real life and live in your own world? wouldn't it be nice if people aren't so mean to each other? wouldn't it be nice if there's no hatred in this world,just serenity and love? wouldn't it be nice if you and me could live together,waking up every morning in your arms.no miles and no distance.hmm.

these past few days i feel mostly happy and sad at the same time and i am still figuring it out how is that possible.

i miss you Dick Cheney,i miss you.i miss you. :(

"will you be my friend in my dream?" #np Soley

today is neither gloomy nor happy day,my mind is playing confusing game on myself which can be consider almost a daily routine.there are so many things in my head now but i don't know say it out because i can't find the precise words for me to say.words,i am so bad at it.so,i guess i am just going to bottle it up like i usually do. *sigh* anyway,it has been a while since i last updated my Flickr and so i logged in to my account,checked several things,messages,contacts and i browsed back my old photos,since November 2010,haha seems so funny that i was such a photo junkie ( and still is ). then i came across on this particular photo which at that time,i was in a post Potter depression,my mind was all about Snape for a week and felt so down until i cried so hard when my friend asked me about the last Potter movie, ( i know, FANATIC ) so to end my depression and to expressed my sadness,i took this ; http://www.flickr.com/photos/phyllizzoesarah/5943196432/in/photostream. it has been a year and i can't believe that time flies so fast eyh. *sigh* enough about Potter.i took several shots earlier on,i miss taking photos!eventhough in my room jak.hahah.random photos,random captions. :)

have you ever feel so alone,so lonely,as if you're the only human there even in a crowded room? yea,i feel that most of the time. 

Mir boyfriend is going to Penang soon,on September,continuing his Degree.am so proud of you sayang. :) LDR again eyh?we both went through it together,i guess we can handle it nicely this time. *hugs*

i'm bored with the usual one color nail so i bought a crack nail polish last Saturday.look at my nails on the image above,damn i love those effects.i know pastels are in but screw pastels,i need to colour up my life with bold tones.i feel so ngegeh. :D

and this Mädchen will always be Forever 21. ;)

Cigarettes and Love.

we were so wasted we didn't ever care about anyone or anything.


we live in our own world,all i could hear was your voice,not their voices,i felt so madly in love on that night and still is madly in love with you now.your hands on my back,down to my waist,my legs on your lap.we were so closed i could feel your breath.counting down to 12 am,July 14th makes us so excited about our monthsary.i laughed because you kept on checking your watch "2 more hours,2 more hours!" you continously whispering love talks on my ear,i smiled because you were so cute.your eyes on me and i can't resist your kisses.felt so soft yet so electric.finally the midnight struck,i didn't realized our lips touched until i felt so many eyes on us but seriously,who cares.you and i in our own world.then we laughed and your hands were still on my back,my lower waist,i loved it.another memory created with you and i never felt that happy for a long time.


p/s i still could taste your gum flavour on my lips,fresh grapes. xx.

|| July 5th, the girl friend's room, exposure gone wrong ||

i need to catch my last train home.

he is the guy that rainbow-ed my mornings and nights,he is the guy that paint my days,doodling like there's no end and he is the one that colours my life.

i decided not to continue my 30 day challenge because i think my vents are much more important than posting music videos from YouTube every single day.i need a place to vent,that's why i created this blog,sometimes talking to people,they don't get you,understand you and feel you hence i usually retreat to my own world and to my blog of course,giving myself a pep talk *yes i do that :P* and i'll be back as a normal sane me.last night was tough.i admit it was totally 100% my fault and all the blame was on me.i shouldn't be so hard on my boyfriend,i shouldn't be a complete monstrous bitch and i completely regret of what i did to him.i shouldn't put too much pressure on him.i shouldn't be selfish.i shouldn't be so self centered.i shouldn't be the type " ME ME ME ".i don't know what the fuck is wrong with me nowadays,i don't know why my mood always changes all the time,from to the happiest lady in the universe falling down rapidly to the evil wicked bitch and when that happens,my mouth turns poison,every curse words comes out like a bomb,an acid bomb until Chen felt so down for the first time in his life.in his life.sometimes,i wish i could shove a bar of soap right down to my throat so i will never ever utter a single word that might cause me regret for the rest of my life. *sigh* when i get angry,my mouth has no filter,i will say whatever i wanna say and i know what words that will going to hurt your feelings and cause you misery.i did that to so many people back then and to ask do i regret some of it?yes but some of those humans were deserved my spiteful words.anyway,i feel like i'm a bad girlfriend.so bad until i cried while halfway through sleep last night and that was the first time i felt like that in my life. *sigh*

despite my drama queen attitude since i was in a high school,Chen forgave me and in fact,he's still being so sweet to me and ask for forgiveness.where am i going to find a good boyfriend like that?maybe in the past he was a "dick" and not being a proper boyfriend blablabla but he changed,he really changed for good and he is the mature one now instead of me.he is the wise one,he is the peace maker and he is the good guy here,not me.i need to get rid of my attitude for real good,i must,not just because of my relationship with him,for the sake of other people as well.i don't want to hurt others with my words anymore.

when you're in a deep connection with someone,you know either the person is the one for you or not the one for you.you don't have to search,figure it out or looking for it,you can feel it naturally.once you feel it,you know it and this is what happens to me and Chen.despite of the age difference,lack of same interests,i usually don't like what he like and vice versa,we have our own idea and perceptions about dreams,life and almost about everything yet i am madly in love with him.why you ask?i don't know..i just love him and when you have no absolute answer about that particular question,it indicates that you love that person so much you take him/her wholeheartedly.credits to Tumblr#

i feel safe in his arms,i feel comfortable,at ease each time we hang out,i feel loved,i feel blessed,i feel great,i feel at peace each time i see his face.he is home to me and i don't want to be late for the last train.

p/s ; we can be like Nick and Norah you know,riding an old car looking for Fluffy and listening to The Real Tuesday Weld and just enjoying each other's company. Dick and Sarah,just like you said. (: 

There's no U and I,only US.

                                     

i've been listening to this song for countless of times ever since i heard it on Something Borrowed,one of my favourite movie.besides,i have nothing to feel except emo-ish because i miss my boyfriend so freaking freaking much. :( he spent two days at my place but frankly,it wasn't enough for me.i have to admit,i am pretty envy with couples who get the chance to see each other every day.sigh* you suck big time miles.pfft.

thank you for making me happy,for making me laugh uncontrollably,for putting a big wide smile upon my face every day,for making me feel loved,for making me feel i'm the only girl in this world,for not giving up hope on us,being there for me regardless how shitty the situations are,for making me believe true relationship do still exist in this world,for making me feel alive again and for being a great,adorable and mature boyfriend to me.

i love you,Chen~ :*

Tu Me Manques~

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)

i fear no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meantand whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

hey July *big hugs*

here we go again,welcoming the new month into our lives and i as a normal human being like you,wishing nothing but the best for this month. :)